Sniffbertson's Sociable Snuff Syncopator
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A great way to get folks together after dinner! This is how it works:
- place the machine on a small round table or plinth at the appropriate height
- tip your supply of snuff into the entry funnel
- gather five of your after-dinner mates close round
- insert all six noses into their respective nose-brackets synchronously
- a quick blast on the pump, and you'll all be feeling much better!
This one is definitely *not* for the servants! In fact, best to keep it locked away to prevent them having too much fun after hours!
There are one or two drawbacks of this device, as a result of design flaws:
- all participants need to be the same height! Things could get awful complicated if they're not: you might have to get into jacking up chairs to adjust heights, wedging the machine under one side to invoke a tilt, or even (those dratted servants always work their way in somehow...) getting a lift-up for elevationally-challenged participants
- everybody needs to be aware that sniffs need to be synchronised with pump operation to avoid getting a snuff-coloured moustache...
- concentrating on getting noses precisely positioned in the brackets might mean there's nobody to operate the pump - perhaps a need for another dratted servant....?
Materials: brass, copper, funnel, blow-torch parts, tripod stand etc
Dimensions: 33" diameter x 17½" high (84cm x 45cm)
Diameter at feet: 6" (15cm)
Dimensions of oak plinth: 10" diameter x 1" high (25cm x 2.5cm)
Weight: 6lb10oz (3kg)
Weight of plinth: 1lb15oz (0.86Kg)
This piece will be shown for the first time in the Gloucestershire Guild of Craftsmen 'Crafts Alive' exhibition at Rodmarton Manor in September 2025.
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